Friday, July 30, 2010
you dont have to pretend i'm a priority. you dont have to convince me i'm not just an option. it's not offensive, i'm just saying that if you're not going to lay out all your cards then just go 100% and admit you're not going to. i'm not asking you to give up things for me, i just wish you could say you're not going to.

i actually wish i took things like you do... so i dont have to put myself out there so much, so i dont have to give up too much of myself, and so it wouldnt hurt so much if you can't be available for the number of things you can't be available for.

you think it's fun KNOWINGLY being 48 laws of power'd?

i will find the answer in Peels.
0 boo(s)

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

shhhh, i'm aiming for a cuatro sem.

i will find the answer in Peels.
0 boo(s)

Monday, July 12, 2010

you dont understand how much i've given up and how it has come back to bite me in the ass.

i always wonder if you could give up the same for me, but i know a lot of things are more important than me/being with me. so i guess i dont want to know the answer to that.

i will find the answer in Peels.
0 boo(s)

Thursday, July 1, 2010

good lord.

i might have a "deep-seated need to be useful" (which i'll never reveal the roots of, btw) but that's only a small part of why i want/need to do things. i want/need to do things mainly because (going back to my previous entry)

I AM HAPPY-GO-LUCKY BY NATURE. NOW I'M SORRY I DIDNT BECOME AS CONFIDENT AS YOUR SCHOOL MADE YOU BUT IN MY HEAD I'VE COME TO REALIZE MY HAPPY-GO-LUCKYNESS WILL NOT GET ME ANYWHERE. THIS MAKES ME SCARED OF BEING INADEQUATE NEXT TO ALL THE PEOPLE I'M GOING IN THE SAME FIELD WITH. CREDENTIALS ARE MY ONLY HOPE. WITHOUT THOSE, IT'LL BE LIKE I'M PLAYING WITH A TUNA FISH WHILE EVERYONE ELSE HAS A RACKET DURING A TENNIS GAME. DO I EVEN LOOK FOR HUGE CREDENTIALS? NO. JUST ENOUGH TO SEEM LIKE I'M ACTUALLY INTO PARTICIPATING.

never mo yang na-gets! kaya wag ka nga mag-marunong!

AND don't you say that like i'm one of them.

I AM NOT!

i will find the answer in Peels.
0 boo(s)